Snaffled from all over the plaice (what? It's 9 am, it's feckin' raining AGAIN, I already want to rub today out and start over, so FISH JOKES! Just for the halibut)
Some classics from a variety of Brit newspapers under the cut - unashamedly filched from Tam Cowan's column in the Daily Record. But they'e too good not to share ;-)